Posted by Katie Hartman (67.172.174.151) on July 5, 2005 at 5:42:59 p.m.:
In Reply to: HernandezRoughDraft3 posted by Lourdes Hernandez on July 5, 2005 at 5:21:54 p.m.:
Reader's Name: Katie Hartman
Writers Name:Lourdes Hernandez
1) Review the assignment requirements. Read the essay. In your opinion, does the writer answer the essay assignment in this piece? Explain.
Yes. the author answers the question and fufills all the requirements.
2) Write the thesis statement here:
I could not find one.
3) Does the thesis attempt to prove a specific idea, or is it too general?
I could not find a clear one.
4) What specific evidence does the writer provide to support the thesis?
There was no thesis I could find, but quotes were used throughout the essay.
5) Does the writer explicitly show how this evidence supports his/her view? Are connections made for the reader?
I was confused reading the quotes and trying to put them together with the essay. The quotes were explained, but not very clearly.
6) Does each paragraph connect with the thesis?
I couldn't find the thesis. but the paragraphs seem to go in numerical order of stanzas.
7) Is there additional evidence which the writer has missed?
Not that I can find. There are a sufficent amount of quotes throughout the essay.
8) Does the conclusion sum up the writer's point?
Yes, but the "In conclusion..." to start the paragraph out doesn't sounds that good. The last sentence is not very conclusive. Needs to have a better concluded sentence that doesn't leave the paragraph hanging.
9) Give the writer at least one suggestion for improving this paper.
Write a clear thesis in your introduction paragraph and try to not have every paragraph start the same way.